I have days when I get really, really down. Usually it’s prompted when I see my old friends out and about, having fun, and knowing that my husband and I are never invited anymore because we have kids. I’d be lying if I said that didn’t hurt. A lot. To the point where I cry over it and feel more lonely that I should. I have faith that one day in the future, I’ll have good friends again. God’s timing is always perfect, I keep reminding myself of that. Having no friends means that I am able to focus 100% on my family and that is what I hold on to. It’s hard not to feel like a horrible person though when it feels like no one wants to be around you. I know that isn’t true, but that’s where my mind tries to take me sometimes.
Yes, this is my pity post. And it makes me feel extremely vulnerable to share it with the world, but I do have a point. From now on, when I start feeling down, I’m going to make a “thankful list” to show myself exactly how blessed I am. I may not have any friends, but I do have:
- an amazing husband. He reminds me that it isn’t me and that our choice to have children was totally worth losing our friends along the way (even though we both admittedly thought we could have kids and our friends… how wrong we were)
- our children. The best “things” that have ever happened to me and my proudest accomplishments.
- my parents. They’ve always been my very best friends and I wouldn’t change that for anything.
- our home. A place to decorate, a kitchen to cook comforting meals in, a tub to clean my dirty children after a day of playing.
- my blog. I know that may seem silly, but it’s my outlet and I’ve met some great friends through it. I wish we could all go out for dinner and drinks, for real!
- lots of time to spend with my family, lots of clothes to wash, dirty dishes to clean, crafts to make, cookies to bake, and best of all, bunches of hugs & kiss to give out & receive
- nothing beats hearing “I love you, mom.” Nothing in this world.
So, there is my simple and somewhat predictable “thankful list” for today. I hope that making a list isn’t necessary too often. I will continue to lean on my faith that God’s timing is always perfect and that he will send me the right people to call my friends and to share my life with.
Every day during the month of November, I’ll be sharing something I’m thankful for on Facebook. I think it will be a great exercise to show thankfulness daily! Once a week, I’ll round-up my Facebook status updates in a blog post.